Welcome back to our Quarantine edition of Stern Singles! For the month of April, we are happy to share with you our charming bachelor, James Prager!
“James is probably the funniest MBA2 at Stern. His sense of humor is both sharp and ridiculous.”
Funny and cute? Can there be a better combo? We’d like fries with that.
“He is one of the kindest and tallest people I know.”
Ok, forget the fries. We like ‘em tall. Hellooooo, friendly, funny, cute giant.
“My acronym for JAMES is Juicy. Athletic. Mesmerizing. Emotionally-intelligent. Smart-ass.”
Hmmm, this is a bit of a mixed message.
“James is the only person I will let lie to me.”
We have no idea what that means, but sure.
James is our eligible bachelor for this edition of Stern Singles. James hails from the great state of Colorado and moved from the highlands to the big city in 2014 to work at a little boutique called Goldman Sachs. After a few years of telling traders how to book their trades, he decided to join the big leagues and come to NYU full-time. He has been deeply involved at Stern through attending beer blast, a brief stint as Editor-in-Chief of this newspaper, and more recently by becoming our first ever international correspondent. He just finished doing a semester abroad at IESE in Barcelona (unfortunately, also cut short by COVID) and will graduate this May.
I first had the pleasure of meeting James in China last year during our two-week tour of China during DBi in Beijing and Shanghai. James kept us continuously entertained with witty banter, live commentary of what was happening in our surroundings, history lessons (both fake and real), and some great stories from Vail (where apparently his family has a ski house, ladies). He ended the DBi by leading a group project on why Bumble should expand to China. Funny, charming and business savvy, if we do say so ourselves.
James, great to (virtually) see that you’re alive and well. How are you? Are you fluent in Spanish and/or Catalan now?
Pa amb tomàquet. Propera parada. That’s about all the Catalan I’ve picked up, I’ll let our readers google what that means. My Spanish is getting pretty good though – they offer free classes during lunch each day. I’m in, ahem, Modulo 7 (of 12).
I’m sorry that your study abroad was cut short! Where in the world are you now and what are you going to do for the rest of the semester?
After three (empty) flights, two days, five airports, and a lot of close-calls (missing my connection in London, for instance), I have made it to my parents house in Denver! Fun fact, the only bar I’ve seen open and serving since before spring break was at Denver International Airport. Book your trip soon! Now that I’ve escaped Europe, I’m settling in for 3AM zoom classes until the semester ends in Spain.
Word on the virtual streets is that you are a COVID survivor?
Impossible to say, although I did get sick with chills, tight chest, aches, got better, and discovered I could no longer taste or smell. At first, I thought the Indian food in Barcelona was just EXTRA bland that week. So, I am fairly confident I am a survivor. But you tell me, isn’t there a doctor-nurse on staff?
Yup, just call me Dr. Dre.
Now, let’s get to the good stuff. You’re single, I take it. What are your favorite qualities in a woman?
Single? No. Wait, this won’t be published anywhere my wives will see it, right?
Yes, I am single and prepared to mingle. Favorite qualities are definitely a sharp sense of humor, pretty smile, and a little bit of ambition.
Tell us about your worst first date?
Can I tell the cat story here? (Definitely not.) Other than that, I would say the time a girl started asking about dating deal-breakers, and announced that she didn’t like beards, and then asked how I felt about shaving mine.
And your best?
Ooh that’s a tough one. Probably the open house at the Isabella Stewart Gardner Museum in Boston. Free wine, live music, interactive exhibits and interesting art.
What are some deal-breakers for you?
Well, certainly girls who don’t like beards.
As I mentioned earlier, you are amazing at making up fake, yet believable, histories on the spot. I don’t know if it’s a talent or a hazard to be able to lie that naturally. If you were going to start a secret conspiracy, what would it be?
Out of any place on earth, Nebraska is closest to the moon, due to natural inconsistencies in the planet’s crust. Because of this, the EU has rented thousands of acres of cornfields to build it’s moonport to escape COVID-19, at the expense of honest, hard-working American taxpayers and dispossessed heartland farmers. All of this has been orchestrated by the Irish Illuminati and Mike Bloomberg.
What do secret conspiracies have to do with a singles feature? I don’t know, I just wanted to put you on the spot.
All hail Gamma Omaha.
Ok, back to it. First date: drinks, dinner, or other?
Drinks for sure. My favorite date in the city is Amor y Amargo – epic cocktail bar that brings great drinks, intimacy and the authentic New York experience.
What are your future plans? Should the unidentified future girlfriend expect a long-distance relationship in her future?
I have signed an offer at PWC New York, assuming the city is still standing in 4 months, so the only distance will be social.
Is there anything else you’d like to tell potential girlfriend candidates? Hey, the future Mrs. Prager could be reading this.
If you like French cooking and Spanish Netflix, I am your guy.
Thanks James. Stay safe. We hear Vail is particularly beautiful to quarantine in. We look forward to livestreaming your future Stern wedding.
If you would like to nominate a classmate for future features of the Stern Spotlight, please email the Oppy staff at email@example.com.